The Mixed-Signal That Kills A Man’s Attraction Even If He Loves You

You know things about people the second you meet them.

You react instantly to unspoken signals people give off. And you reach conclusions about them within seconds. It happens automatically.

But what if I told you there’s a specific kind of body language that takes men a little longer to detect? It’s a signal that can spark a man’s romantic feelings for you. Or it can repel him.

Would you like to know what it is?

To skip ahead and see what this is about right now, watch this video. It explains the hidden signal that either repels a man or makes him feel irresistibly attracted to you.

Or keep reading to discover the tell-tale body-language men are hard-wired to notice in a woman.

I call it his secret obsession.

As a professional relationship coach, I have spent years looking for the “active ingredients” that make people fall in love. And in this article, I’m going to share the most powerful one I’ve found yet.

His secret obsession is a signal he’s tuned in to all the time. It’s something he can sense whether or not you even realize you are broadcasting the signal.

Now, men get obsessed with all kinds of things. Like money, status, and power. This is a topic I’ve covered in detail elsewhere.  But in this article we are talking about a different kind of obsession.  It has to do with relationships.

Now, consider this. They say bees can “smell fear.” Technically speaking, it’s not true.

Of course, bees are very sensitive to human behavior. If you run circles while flapping your arms, you will startle them. And possibly provoke an attack.

But if you move calmly among them, they won’t perceive a threat. And they’ll leave you alone.

This is because your emotions show up in your body language.

And just like the bees, it turns out…

Men Are Extremely Sensitive to Something in Your Body Language That You Would Never Expect.

Have you ever noticed that some people are better at reading body language than others?

There are some people who could listen to you talk for an hour and still not understand you. While others understand you before you speak a single word.

Which kind of man would you rather spend your life with?


That’s why your ability to broadcast the right non-verbal message makes all the difference when it comes to attracting the kind of man you want.

If you’ve been attracting attention from guys who fail to connect with you on a deep, emotional level, I may be able to show you why.  You’re probably sending out just one very confusing signal…without even realizing it.

With the wrong signal, you end up with this:

  • Attention from the wrong kind of guys. The ones you aren’t interested in.
  • Initial attraction that later fades with the one guy you really wanted to attract.
  • A slow and painful for the attraction and passion in your existing relationship.

But with a slight adjustment, you could be sending the right signal all the time. And you’d end up getting results more like this:

  • Passion that intensifies the longer you’re together
  • Increasing signs that he feels protective of you
  • Growing desire and romantic connection
  • A deep feeling of private exclusivity as he opens up to you and lets you meet his needs

The difference can be dramatic. And it all comes down to this one signal I’m about to show you. A signal that can trigger his secret obsession.

In order to explain this signal, think of yourself as a radio tower.

You are constantly broadcasting a message to the men in your life. And there’s one “channel” he can’t tune out.

That’s because men have emotional “antennas” designed specifically to detect this one kind of signal.

Ready to find out which signal I’m talking about? It’s respect. Well, specifically it’s nonverbal indicators of respect.

He reads your body language to see how he measures up in your eyes. Does she respect me? Or am I just her play thing?

Does she look up to me in some ways?  Does she value me compared to other men? Or is she just settling?

Why are men so sensitive to this one signal?

Why, of all things, is respect his secret obsession?

Because, oddly enough, this signal tells him how you compare him to other men.  So it influences how he feels about himself whenever he’s around you.

And it’s amazing how much this one signal affects his emotions.

You see, in relationships, people don’t tell us what we really want to know. We have to listen to what’s written between the lines.

This kind of “listening” determines how we feel about each person we meet. And when it comes to romantic relationships, it tells us far more than spoken words.

In fact, it speaks to the one thing we crave the most. It tells us how we are perceived in the eye of the beholder.

Now tell me this. Which man would you rather commit to for life? A man who compliments your beauty but seems to have difficulty keeping his eyes off other women? Or a man who is reserved with his compliments, but seems to have eyes only for you?

The truth is, no one wants to end up with someone who is just settling. Instead, you want to feel desired.

Why Men Confuse Love and Respect

What makes men feel desired is very different from what makes women feel desired.

Research shows men often confuse love and respect. A man does not want to be loved by a romantic partner unless she also respects him.

Otherwise, it just feels like motherly love. That’s not what he wants. It’s not how he wants to perceive himself in his primary relationship.

And that’s why…

Women often send mixed signals to the guy they’re interested in without even knowing it.

It happens accidentally. And I have to tell you, it’s not your fault.

Society has changed too fast for men and women to adapt to the rapid changes. We are left scrambling.

In nearly every culture there used to be a clear set of expectations. Those expectations guided men and women through the process of connecting with a lifelong partner. Demonstrations of respect were built into that process of courtship.

But those clear expectations are a thing of the past.  These days, each couple has to invent their own path, dancing around unspoken expectations and feelings of uncertainty.

And there’s something else that gets lost in the process.

The Language of Respect

I’m talking about the ancient art of communicating desire through the language of respect.

There was a time when women knew exactly how to communicate their admiration for a man. And admiration is what a man wants.

He doesn’t want you to settle. He wants to feel like you see him as the ultimate catch.

Otherwise, it deflates his ego.  And with it, his passion for the relationship deflates too. He just can’t picture himself with a woman who looks up to other men more than she looks up to him.

But this is where things get confusing. Many women want to make their man feel respected.  But a woman’s idea of respect is very different than a man’s.

How do you communicate your true feelings to a man? And why are men so sensitive to tiny signals of respect and disrespect?

To dive a little deeper into that particular question, I put together a video presentation on the topic. It explains why love and respect become so entangled in a man’s mind.

After watching this video, many women are surprised to learn a man can actually feel more deeply in love when he feels more deeply respected. That seems strange, doesn’t it? And yet that is the reality for men.

The Ultimate Gift

Many of us have a tendency to buy gifts of the sort we would like to receive ourselves. It can be like that with love. We try to love our partner the way we want to be loved.

So you make him feel special. Yet he seems unaffected by that. You speak your own native love language to him. Apparently, he speaks another.

But I’m here to tell you about one incredible, universal method you can use to grab his attention by showing that you get what he needs.

Click here now to discover an unfair advantage that works with all men. Help him to finally see you as the one.

I’d like to show you his secret obsession and how you can use it to build a beautiful romance like nothing you’ve ever experienced with a man before.

James Bauer

Relationship Coach and Author of the world-famous online relationship course, His Secret Obsession and highly reviewed blog about dating and relationships at